Friday, February 25, 2011

Goodbye Borders

As I’m sure pretty much everyone knows, big changes are afoot in the way media – including books – is delivered to the buying public. More and more, the Internet has become the premiere shopping spot for books, music, video and the like, and this change, naturally, has had a severe impact on the old “brick and mortar” way of doing business. Each day, it seems, another bookstore or music store closes their doors forever… sort of like blacksmith shops when automobiles started to catch on, or typewriter shops when computers became commonplace.

The latest victim of this change is Borders, which was previously a major bookseller right up there with Barnes & Noble. Borders’ management is saying that the company is merely restructuring and regrouping, but with so many Borders stores closing around the country, it’s pretty obvious that the end is near. The photo of The World Is Your Litter Box (above) was taken at the Borders store in downtown San Francisco, which is currently in the process of being picked clean before it closes.

Still, change is inevitable, and on the bright side, the Internet is offering all kinds of very cool options for book buyers and authors such as yours truly. For example, if you have an e-reader, you can download The World Is STILL Your Litter Box and be reading it in minutes without even having to leave your home. (Yes, I know… another shameless plug for my second book. Sorry…I couldn’t resist!)

Sad as it is to see the old ways change and disappear, it is truly exciting to be living in an age when new ideas and innovations seem to be coming at us on a daily basis. Can new advances in litter boxes and scratching posts be far behind?

Tuesday, February 15, 2011

The REAL Reason for the Protests in Egypt

I’m pretty certain there’s not a human or cat on Earth that does not know about the protests in Egypt that have driven longtime president/dictator Hosni Mubarak from power. But what many people DON’T know is the REAL REASON for the protests. Sure, everyone has heard about the oppression, the plundering of Egypt’s wealth, and worst of all, the cutoff of the Internet… but that’s not what sent thousands of Egyptians into the streets. Your intrepid reporter, Quasi Tutankhamun, has the true story, but first, a little history…

The ancient Egyptians, in their glorious wisdom, worshipped a cat goddess named Bastet, who became a national deity around 950 BC (that’s a long time ago, even in cat years). Bastet, who was also known as Bast, was a happy and benign goddess who brought good fortune and joy to all… sort of like kitties today. And because all cats were considered to be manifestations of Bastet, they were considered sacred – in fact, cats were so highly regarded in Egyptian society that it was a crime to kill a cat and punishable by death. Some Egyptians were even jailed for failing to give their cats proper tummy rubs (actually, I just made that part up, but let’s just say that those Egyptian kitties certainly had it made!).

Now, to the real reason for the protests. Of all the odious things Hosni Mubarak did during his 30-year rule, perhaps none were more insidious that his stubborn refusal to accept the fact that cats are STILL sacred like they were in ancient Egypt, and that Egypt can only have one true leader… the cat goddess Bastet. Well, clearly something as egregious as this could not be tolerated… so, like the good cat lovers they are, the modern day Egyptians took it to the streets, and after several days of angry protests, they righted this appalling wrong.

So, fellow manifestations of Bastet, no matter which human ends up being the titular head of Egypt, never forget that Egypt’s real leader walks on four legs, purrs, looks cute, and no matter how demanding the stress of leadership may be, always has time for a nice tummy rub.

Sunday, February 13, 2011

Happy Valentine's Day!

Well, it’s that time of year again when a young cat’s fancy turns to love, although yours truly is a hunk-a-hunk-a burnin’ love 365 days a year. Still, there’s nothing like having a special day dedicated to amour for everyone to enjoy and remember how important love truly is. I hope everyone has someone special to share it with.

For your loving (and laughing) pleasure, here’s the “Valentine’s Day” excerpt from the “Holiday Fun & Danger” chapter of The World Is Your Litter Box

Valentine’s Day: A good holiday for cats. Love is in the air and typically, male humans give female humans gifts such as candy and flowers. This means you will have wrapping paper and ribbons to play with and flowers to sniff (and eat). If your human gets a box of candy and leaves the top off, you can have the sumptuous pleasure of licking and sampling each individual piece. Because humans tend to get all mushy and gooey on Valentine’s day, you can usually expect to receive a little extra lovin’ yourself, and maybe even a present. Steve and his female are such shameless cat lovers that they always buys me a Valentine present, usually a cat toy, catnip, or the most expensive kind of kitty food. Ain’t love grand!

NOTE: In some instances on Valentine’s Day, your human may pay more attention to another human than you. This is UNACCEPTABLE HUMAN BEHAVIOR and cannot be tolerated. If your human is being amorous with another human and ignoring you, jump between (or on) them and meow loudly to express your displeasure. Then, turn your back, stick your rear end in their faces and march off in a huff. Make them understand that Valentine’s Day or not, you are numero uno and will not be ignored.

Along with Steve and his female, and Bo Diddley and Piglet (my kitty housemates) I want to wish you and yours a most happy Valentine’s Day!

Friday, February 4, 2011

Valentine's Day Gift Suggestions (For Males Only!)

Hey tomcats and male humans… I know what you’re thinking right about now. You’re thinking, “Yikes! Valentine’s Day is just a little over a week away and I haven’t gotten anything for my honey! Whatever shall I do?” Well, if your Valentine loves cats (and who doesn’t), may I humbly suggest that you buy her my two books, The World Is Your Litter Box and the sequel, The World Is STILL Your Litter Box. In fact, to accentuate my point, here are ten good reasons why my books would make such great presents for your cat-loving Valentine:
  1. They’re much more original than roses.
  2. They’re way cheaper than roses (now I’ve got your attention, huh).
  3. They’re less fattening than chocolates.
  4. They won’t melt and turn gooey like chocolates.
  5. We need the money more than See’s Candy or FTD Florist.
  6. They’re sexier than anything you'll find at Victoria's Secret (well... maybe not)
  7. Your Valentine will be impressed with your exceptional taste in literature.
  8. You can order the books from Amazon and avoid the dreaded mall… and Amazon will even gift wrap them for you!
  9. Your Valentine will think you’re the cat’s pajamas for getting her such a unique and thoughtful gift.
  10. Your Valentine will like my books so much, you might even get lucky!
So this Valentine’s Day, give her what she REALLY wants… her own copies of The World Is Your Litter Box and The World Is STILL Your Litter Box. Order them right away and be a hero on February 14th!