ONE MONTH 'TIL RELEASE OF THE WORLD IS YOUR LITTER BOX

My ultra-hilarious how-to manual for cats, The World Is Your Litter Box, will be released ONE MONTH FROM TODAY! Edgy, laugh-out-loud funny, and loaded with cat attitude (would you expect anything else?), this book is sure to change the course of history for the better (for cats, anyway). For more information and excerpts, and to pre-order a copy of the book, visit the official The World Is Your Litter Box website.

BLOW-UP OF BOOK COVER

I'm VERY excited because today, Sterling Publishing sent me a gigantic blow up of the cover of TheWorld Is Your Litter Box. It will be used by Steve when he does book signings on my behalf (since I don't have opposable thumbs, it would be rather difficult for me to sign books). Check out the picture of Steve holding MY book cover!

WHEN THE FEMALE'S AWAY, THE CAT WILL....

Steve's female left this morning to visit her family, so that means for the next few days, Steve and I will be bachelors again. Although Steve will certainly miss his female, he's kinda happy because now he can leave the house a mess without any repercussions, drink lots of beer, eat junk food, and leave the seat to his litter box up. In reality, however, what it really means is that things will deteriorate pretty quickly around the old homestead. I hope he doesn't forget to feed me! Stay tuned.

THE ANIMAL RESCUE SITE NEEDS OUR HELP

The Animal Rescue Site, which is a wonderful organization devoted to providing food for rescued animals in shelters and sanctuaries, needs our help. Their website has a "Click Here to Give" button that facilitates the provision of food to needy animals at no cost to the visitor (it's paid for by the site sponsors). The problem is, not enough humans have been visiting the site and clicking the button... so, fellow cat, I'm counting on you to tell your human that there will be NO PEACE ON EARTH until they start visiting the Animal Rescue Site and clicking the button on a daily basis. For their convenience, they can bookmark the site and start clicking right from this post.

The Animal Rescue Site site can also be accessed from the "Links" page on the official The World Is Your Litter Box website. Let's all pitch in and help our four-legged friends (yes, even dogs!)

MARCH MADNESS FOR CATS

We're finally coming to the end of March Madness and I'm happy to see that my favorite college team, the Washington State Cougars, is in the East Regionals of the NCAA Tournament. Actually, I don't know anything about basketball except that it's played by very tall humans and involves a lot of running around, and I don't really know if Washington State is good enough to win the whole enchilada... but from a cat's perspective, the name "Cougars" has a nice ring to it.

SOME GREAT NEW CAT SITES

Heads up, fellow cats (and cat lovers)! Here are three great new cat sites for you to join: Kitty Happy, My Pet and I, and My Cat Space. I'm a member of all three and can personally attest to their high degree of kittyness (although My Pet and I is open to pets of all kinds... yes, even dogs!). Check out these sites and tell 'em Quasi sent ya.

CELEBRATING PURR-EM

There was another holiday last week, in addition to St. Patty’s Day and Easter – the Jewish holiday of Purr-em. It began on the evening of March 20. This holiday commemorates the day in ancient Babylonia when the famous Queen Esther saved all the Jewish kitties and fed them all treats. What a gal! There’s even a Book of Esther in the bible. Today, Queen Esther’s largess is commemorated with a special kitty meal, toys, a party, and of course, lots of treats, including ham pate-filled cat cookies called ham-and-treatsen (pictured). Mazel Tov!

WHAT TO DO WITH LEFTOVER PEEPS

Even though Easter is over, many households are still brimming with leftover Easter detritus such as colored eggs, headless chocolate bunnies, and perhaps the most nauseating of all Easter traditions… Peeps. To us cats, these gooey marshmallow creations are good for only one thing after Easter, and that’s for use as batting around material.

Here’s a good thing to do with leftover Peeps: Carry them into the kitchen and bat them around until they end up under the refrigerator. Because most humans rarely clean under the refrigerator, the Peeps will become petrified and covered with dirt and dust. Then, around July or so, when their presence is revealed by a trail of ants, you can sit back and watch the fun as your human cleans up the deplorable mess. Yes, Peeps truly are the holiday tradition that keeps on giving!

HELP FOR PETS IN MIDWEST

With the terrible flooding in the midwest, many cats and other four-legged friends (yes, even dogs) will be in dire need of help. If you can, you might want to convince your human to make a donation to one or more of the many animal rights organizations and rescure groups, whose resources will, no doubt, be severely strained in the months to come. There's a list of animal groups on the "Links" page of my website (www.theworldisyourlitterbox.com).

To those cats (and pet lovers) who live in the affected area, my thoughts and purrayers are with you.

CUTENESS COMPETITION FROM THE EASTER BUNNY?

Although we cats are, without question, the cutest animals on earth, at this time of the year, we face serious cuteness competition from the Easter Bunny. Like us, bunnies have soft fur and adorable little faces, and if that isn't enough, they wiggle their little pink noses.

How can we cats compete with that? Funny you should ask... in my forthcoming book, The World Is Your Litter Box, (yes, another crass, shameless plug) I have a chapter called "Holiday Fun & Danger." The "Easter" segment of the chapter includes detailed advice on how to meet the Easter bunny's cuteness mano a mano and send him (or her) packing with its cute little tail between its legs.

Unfortunately, my book won't be out in time for Easter, so in the meantime, just let your human know that while the Easter bunny may be the "cuteness" champ this Sunday, you provide cuteness 365 days a year with no strings (or Easter baskets) attached.

Presidential Candidates' Positions on Cats

In case you were wondering who is the most pro-cat of our presidential candidates, I've done some research. McCain is the only candidate that currently shares his home with cats. As we all know, Hillary is Bill Clinton's female and Bill had the famous Socks while he was in the White House (although he gave Socks away and adopted a dog!). So she can be securely counted on to further the rights of cats. Obama currently has no pets, but has promised his daughters that they will soon get a dog! O, the perfidy! Please, Obama, say it ain't so!

The Cat Whisperer -- Harummpf!

There's an interesting article in today's Salon.com called "The Cat Whisperer." It's about a cat named Thompson who is a biter. The female human owner actually hired a cat behaviorist to fix the problem (that sounds like something our female would have thought up). As I wrote in my letter to the editor, they should have saved their money, because problem could be summed up in one word: D-O-G. Yes, that's right, the family had a dog. I'd bite, too, if my human or his female ever got a dog, just to show who's boss. Am I right or am I right?

THE WORLD IS YOUR LITTER BOX RELEASE DATE

The World Is Your Litter Box, my hilarious how-to manual for cats, will be released on Tuesday, May 6th, just a mere six weeks from today! This book is a MUST HAVE for cats and cat-loving humans everywhere (if I don't say so myself). For more information and excerpts from the book, and to pre-order a copy, please visit the official The World Is Your Litter Box website.

NEW FRIENDS AT KITTY HAPPY

Hey, fellow cats (and human cat lovers),

I want to let you know about a really fantastic cat site/blog north of the border in Toronto. It's called Kitty Happy (http://www.kittyhappy.com/) and its got all kinds of fun and interesting cat-related stuff. I've joined up as a friend and I highly recommend you do the same... it's a great way for all us felines (and feline lovers) to communicate.

I also want to thank Joey Garr and Jeff Robinson for their unbridled enthusiasm about The World Is Your Litter Box (yes, you know I can't do any posts without including at least one shameless plug for my book). You can say "hi" to Joey and Jeff at Kitty Happy... they'll be happy to hear from you.

FIRST PRINTING OF THE WORLD IS YOUR LITTER BOX EXCEEDS ESTIMATE

The groundswell for The World Is Your Litter Box has begun. Initial orders from bookstores exceeded Sterling Publishing's original estimate, so the first printing was increased by nearly one-third!

The initial supply of books will sell out quickly, so visit the official The World Is Your Litter Box website and reserve your copy today.

The World Is Your Litter Box will be released on May 6, 2008. Cats (and cat lovers) of the world rejoice!

THE WORLD IS YOUR LITTER BOX RELEASE DATE

The release date for The World Is Your Litter Box approaches. The book will be released on May 6, 2008, which is a mere SEVEN WEEKS from today! For more information about Litter Box and lots of other fun cat stuff, and to pre-order a copy of the book, please visit The World Is Your Litter Box. com.

Our Sterling Publicist

Paula Allen, agent extraordinaire, reports that she has spoken to the head of publicity at Sterling Publishing. I will have my publicity liaison soon!

CATS LOWER RISK OF HEART ATTACK

According to an article in the "Health" section of Monday's Los Angeles Times, owning a cat may lower one's risk of dying from a heart attack by as much as 40%. This information, which is based on a study of 4,435 people from the second National Health & Nutrition Examination survey, was presented at the American Stroke Association's International Stroke Conference in New Orleans last month.

So now you can add longer life to the multitude of services we cats provide to humans. If you don't have a cat, I suggest you get one immediately! And while you're at it, why not pre-order a copy of my forthcoming book, The World Is Your Litter Box, which will help your new cat learn the ropes and provide you with some cheap laughs. For more information, please visit the official The World Is Your Litter Box website.

The World Is Your Litter Box Goes to Press

My forthcoming book, The World Is Your Litter Box, which will be released by Sterling Publishing on May 6, 2008, has gone to press. The book is being printed by Donnelly at a location outside of Chicago, right here in the good, old USA (No cheapo outsourcing for us!).

The initial orders for The World Is Your Litter Box exceeded Sterling's original estimate, so the first printing was increased by almost one-third. Still, these books will go fast, so visit the official Litter Box website and reserve your copy today!